1. The use of a hairdryer is a vital aesthetic and artistic statement. 2. Tosca, the story of a happy go lucky baron with a heart of gold and a user friendly SM/Leather fetish, ends after the second act. 3. Don Giovanni is a love story and somehow being dragged bodily to hell is a… [Read More]
Fashion Week at Lincoln Center
We’re not plugged in to the New York fashion scene so of course we didn’t get invited to any of the Fashion Week events of 2012. Imagine our excitement when a partner at Elizabeth’s law firm gave us tickets to see the Barbara Siviglia collection at Lincoln Center. We got dressed up in our trendiest… [Read More]
How To Stylishly Cuddle At The Metropolitan Opera And Other Dirty Tricks
I have been to the Met a great great many times, and with a great (great) many women throughout the years, and have had many bizarre adventures there. (Ask me about the time I had sex with my high school girlfriend on the Zeffirelli Third Act set of Aida while the Second Act Triumphal March… [Read More]
BREAKING NEWS! Peter Gelb uses urinal. Has change of heart amidst intense internet criticism. Then uses stall.
Preliminary reports are trickling in from the Lincoln Center area of Peter Gelb using a urinal in a men’s room. Witnesses report halfway through his famed and intricate hand washing ritual, Gelb experienced a change of heart amidst intense internet criticsm and then entered a stall for several hours. More on this story as… [Read More]
Portrait of the Young Artist as a Middle Aged Gay Man
I started dressing like a middle aged wealthy gay man when I was 9. I would wear a purple silk ascot, double breasted velvet blazer and penny loafers (with actual pennies in them) to Church on Sundays. Being raised by your opera diva mother does odd things to your psyche, what can I tell you?… [Read More]
RICK SANTORUM TAKES OVER AS GENERAL MANAGER OF THE METROPOLITAN OPERA
Largo al Santorum After James Levine’s health problems and Peter Gelb’s upcoming tragic accident in an abandoned pool, a power vacuum has been left at the Metropolitan Opera. Rick Santorum has stepped in to fill the vacuum as new General Manager of the Metropolitan Opera. “We’re shocked to get him. That he was available… [Read More]
