Last week after finally obtaining a subscription to the Metropolitan Opera—and clearing up error after error (in call after draining call) —I received an email requesting I answer a survey from the Met. It warned me that it would take up to 20 minutes to complete. That’s a fairly long time for a survey, but I naively took it as an indicator of sincerity. The Met appears to be overhauling its image, programs and general direction and welcoming input from its base is a good sign.
The survey begins with a host of questions about attendance and what types of cultural events you enjoy at Lincoln Center. It then becomes tailored to some of your answers. I received a slew of questions about why I was attending more. “Despite its myriad of questionable artistic and business decisions, the Met is still the main game in town” was not included amongst the answers sadly.
When answering might or might not renew my subscription package, I was then offered a large list of reasons as to why. But there wasn’t anything about not liking their public relations or poor customer service. One of my main reasons for not renewing would be the condescension from customer service—except for the exceedingly competent and charming Mary-Lynn, of course. I suppose this is to be included in the “Not a big fan of the Met’s artistic direction” and “Had a bad experience/annoyed with the Met” answers available on a couple questions but they don’t inquire as to what kind of a bad experience. They should. It should open up to a whole giant submenu of irritations and dissatisfactions with answers like “I don’t like it when Institutions threaten reviewers” and “I don’t like it when I am treated like dirt”.
The survey proceeds with a LOT of questions about what the Met could do to get you to donate. They also want to know if you would consider leaving your estate, or part of it, to the Met. One of the stranger lists of answers comes under “The Met is considering additional Member benefits to further engage Live in HD audiences. How interested are you in each of these potential benefits?” They suggest “Recognition on the Met website with donors listed by state.” I don’t know about you, but when I go to the Met’s website, I’m interested in browsing through a state by state list to see who gave money to the Met in Idaho. Also offered is an Annual Live in HD memento—Inside Live in HD brochure vs a Live in HD mug as member benefits. Who in their right mind wouldn’t want a glossy two-page brochure after a $50 donation?
I found stranger still the “Invitation to a Met-hosted event in your community” option. Community is a vague word. In New York, I could see a cocktail hour. But what about in Idaho? Met sponsored bowling nights? Or what about Elma, Iowa’s Met hosted Turtle and Fish Fry? I like the idea of the Met branching out across the country like that.
Some questions were not on my 20 minute survey. And after my last series of phone calls with customer service, I feel they should be. For instance instead of question after question about donating to the Met and how you would donate and what would get you to donate more, perhaps “Do you feel you were properly revealed by Met Customer Service as not a mistress?” “Were you condescended to: A Lot, Not Enough, Just the Right Amount?” “Do you feel Met Customer Service and Guild Reps should be less helpful than a McDonald’s Drive Through Operator with an Armenian accent?” “Do you feel Met Service Reps exist on a higher plane of existence than you by the mere fact of their working for the Met and therefore should treat you like a serf begging for scraps from the Master’s table?”
Additionally, it would serve the Met to inquire about its website and web assistance. When I first joined the Met Guild, it took multiple phone calls to the Guild’s customer service and return phone calls from a Mr. Brown to sort out simply setting up my password. The Met would also be greatly served by updating its site. When I am finally able to log in, a process that takes close to 10 minutes due to the site’s achingly slow speed, I feel like I’m visiting the virtual ghettoized ghost town of MySpace.
Given the new productions Gelb is presenting and the broad approach he is taking, why not include suggestions for productions on the survey? I just returned from Macbeth—six blocks lower at Lincoln Center Jazz—and Gay Scottish Male Nudity goes a long way let me tell you.
Finally, one thing I forgot to include in my survey as a plus. I received my subscription tickets last week and all the tickets come on one card and that is neat. Like minted right off the printing press, although perhaps I’m easily impressed. Despite all the torment, I still look forward to attending the Met next season. As I said, for better or worse, it’s still the main game in town.– Elizabeth Frayer & Shawn E Milnes
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Hmm… cocktail parties are for Manhattan, but mere bowling nights are for Idaho. For someone so incensed by condescension on the part of others, you sure know how to dish it out. Typical rude, sarcastic, and high-strung New Yorker whining. (irony)